Be the rock your partner can lean on during your IVF treatment - just like she deserves.

Some men are raised to be some kind of soldier from childhood on. Hide your emotions! Be tough! They learn very early on that boys are not supposed to cry or complain. In fact, they grow a protective shield around them based on what everyone tells them, which makes it hard for them to express their emotions. Unfortunately, this can become a natural and permanent state of mind for them.

Other men grow up surrounded by the freedom to express their emotions. It is natural for them to talk about their feelings, which makes them considerably more empathetic and vulnerable at the same time. I belong to this group and, in my opinion, my kind of men need more support throughout their life, especially in relationships. That is why they often choose stronger women as their partners.

It does not matter which group you belong to. When undergoing fertility treatments, we all need to make some changes. If you have a stronger character you will need to become a bit more sensitive and learn how to respond to the challenges of your journey with sufficient subtlety. There is nothing wrong with determination or a healthy sense of reality. However, you will need to try to soften your character and become a little more compassionate. The sensitive souls, myself included, should put their hypersensitivity somewhat aside because your partner needs someone who can be strong and provide solid support during difficult days.

The reality of IVF is uncertain; either you succeed or you don’t. Your fertility treatment will be accompanied by constant doubts and question marks. The truth is that during your journey you will most probably experience some great victories, but many failures as well. All of these new experiences will greatly affect you both mentally and emotionally, and you will have to be her number one supporter during all of these ups and downs.

My strategy is to empathise with all of the emotions that she may feel at that moment. I accept the fact that her mood changes more frequently than it normally does. Every time I feel like she wants to talk about the fertility process or tell me how she is feeling, I put everything else aside because the most important thing for me is to be there for her. Sometimes I just listen, other times I tell her my point of view, even though I am definitely not trying to be a know-it-all. Typically, I don’t even initiate a conversation about IVF, unless I read or hear something interesting or beneficial that I would like to share with her.

Another useful trick I have learnt was to divert her attention, which was necessary more than just a few times. This came particularly handy when we were waiting for important news regarding test results or procedure outcomes, for example, after the oocyte (egg) retrieval, when we were waiting for information about how many of our oocytes had been fertilised.

I try to stay level headed at all times, even though my overly emotional self is trying to rebel against that from time to time. Believe me when I say that sometimes deep down inside there is more tension in me than in her. I experience the same uncertainties as she does, and I am scared and disappointed at times, too. But I really hope that she doesn’t know this.

And the conclusion? Make sure that your woman and her feelings are always the centre of attention. Don’t forget to be cooperative, supportive, and attentive.

An unusual story to reassure you that there is no need to fear the oocyte retrieval procedure.

We woke up very early on the day of the oocyte retrieval (OCR). We had to be at the clinic by 7.30AM, as my OCR was scheduled for 9.30AM.

I followed the list of instructions I received by the clinic: slippers, robe, and ID cards ready to go. The only thing left to do was to iron my favourite nightie. My husband did it for me because first of all, he is much better at ironing than I am, and second of all, as he said, it was his participation in the oocyte retrieval. I was not allowed to eat, drink, or smoke after midnight, because the oocyte retrieval might be performed under general anaesthesia. The clinic also asked me to remove nail polish or artificial nails (but I don’t wear any so I did not have to concern myself with that).

I could not believe that altogether the whole procedure took only 10 minutes. I would not call it the most comfortable experience of my life, but I would definitely not call it painful either; if anything, it was absolutely tolerable.

We arrived at the clinic on time and as planned. After a quick check-in, during which we filled out several forms, we were asked to say goodbye for a while because we both had important tasks to fulfill separately. We had enough time for one more kiss and a “it’s going to be alright” hug - reassuring each other that everything will go smoothly.

A very kind nurse guided me to one of the preparation rooms and asked me to change and get ready for the procedure. When I stepped out of the bathroom in my freshly ironed nightie, I met a doctor in the room who wanted to have a last consultation with me before the oocyte collection. He informed me that due to the COVID-19 situation the hospitals are ordered to minimise the number of anaesthesia procedures (probably because the anaesthesiologists were busy with seriously ill Covid patients). He proceeded to explain to me that general anaesthesia is not absolutely necessary in my case because of my low egg count. He reassured me that all will be fine and promised me that there is nothing to worry about. I was not able to answer anything other than a very weak “OK”.

I asked for just five minutes to calm myself down a little bit. I laid down on the bed and tried my best to meditate (thank God I could finally use what I learnt in my online meditation classes). After a little while I got to take anti-anxiety medication prior to surgery. I would have preferred to take a few more than just one but the kind nurse reassures me that one would be enough.

While waiting for my painkiller injection, I started to recall everything that I have learnt about the oocyte collection procedure. The doctor will use an ultrasound probe with a needle attached to it, and he will insert the needle through the vaginal wall into my ovaries in order to reach my follicles. Afterwards, they are going to use the needle to suction out the fluid from the follicles and, hopefully, the oocyte will be retrieved along with it.

I have decided not to call my husband and tell him that I will undergo this procedure without general anaesthesia as I did not want to worry him during his semen collection. So I just continued to relax and meditate until it was time for the oocyte retrieval.

The nurse returned to let me know what the team was ready for me and she showed me the way to the surgery room. It looked similar to a normal gynaecology room except that everything looked and smelled very sterile. I was asked to lay down on the bed and they double checked my name and my birth date to make sure that all my oocytes were going to be labelled correctly. My doctor promised to explain everything to me throughout the procedure. He even showed me the monitor where, like he said, I could check if he was doing his job properly. On the screen I saw my five amazing follicles - they looked like little berries inside of a balloon.

The doctor then asked for my final confirmation to make sure that I was ready and he began the collection. I could only feel a slight sting during the insertion and right after that I could see how he reached the follicles one by one. After just a few minutes he told me that I did a great job and that we were DONE. My five incredible eggs came out of their follicles and they were ready to go to the lab to meet the “boys”. Mission accomplished!

I could not believe that altogether the whole procedure took only 10 minutes. I would not call it the most comfortable experience of my life, but I would definitely not call it painful either; if anything, it was absolutely tolerable. The main trick is to remain still and not move despite the discomfort.

I know that my story is a little bit unusual because 95% of you are going to have an oocyte retrieval under general anaesthesia, which will allow your surgeon to take their time to collect all of your oocytes - and hopefully it will be a greater number than in my case. Nevertheless, I felt like it was important to share my experience to reassure you that there is nothing to be afraid of during an oocyte retrieval.

A few tips to win over your fear of needles, and be a superwoman.

These days are about growing as many healthy, and mature eggs as possible with the help of ovarian stimulation. More eggs mean a better chance of succeeding.

According to my stimulation protocol I uploaded my medication plan to Leeaf, and also scheduled my next ultrasound appointment. This little extra help ensures me that all are on track. Being organized always comforts me.

That’s how I won over my fears of needles. I felt like an unstoppable superwoman every day after my injections, but to be honest, my fear was much bigger than realistic.

The day following my clinic visit, I had to administer my first daily hormone injection by myself. Of course – because of my nervousness – I was not sure anymore how to use the injection pen properly, even though the nurse gave me a proper training just 24 hours ago. The instruction book seemed a bit complicated to me, so I decided to go for an official Youtube tutorial. It’s better to check it twice, than doing anything wrong, right?

After double-checking the theory, I still had to deal with the reality: my fear of needles. This little problem won’t stop me for sure, but it makes me feel anxious. The needle is very tinny, but still - I am not professional – I am scarred that it’s going to hurt. I can be sure that 1 out of 4 women undergoing IVF has the same feeling as I do, because it's estimated that fear of needles affects up to 25% of adults. So, I am definitely not alone with this one either.

I did some research, and actually there are a few tricks we can do to make the daily injections easier:

1. Ice the area before injecting so you can numb it.
2. Pinch the skin at the injection site. Injections go right under the skin before you reach the muscle.
3. Keep the muscle flaccid by standing on the leg opposite to the one in which you are injecting.
4. Make sure to relax. Practice some deep breaths and make sure the muscle you are going to inject is loose.
5. Pretend you’re braver than you feel. Count to three and shoot.

If we cannot conceive naturally, it’s good to know which options we have in the world of artificial reproduction treatments (ART).

When we are confronted with the fact that we are not able to have a child in the natural way, we are directed to a fertility center. At the clinic it’s easy to get overwhelmed with all the new information we have to take in. As beginners, we didn’t even know which are the ways to consider or what are the differences between the different forms of fertility treatments. The most commonly known fertility treatment is IVF, but it’s not the only one. But which are real options for us, and which direction should we take?

"We also have to talk about the classic in vivo fertilization. Simply put, have sex because anything can happen at any time."

The first two are relatively simple solutions to treat infertility, such as Planned Intercourse and Artificial Insemination.

The simplest fertility treatment is called Planned (or Timed) Intercourse. In this procedure a mild ovarian stimulation can be involved, promoting the growth of 2-3 follicles ideally. If the follicular growth is optimal (the doc checks it though ultrasound), ovulation can happen naturally or can be provoked by a trigger injection. By the end of the process the doctor will determine the days when it is most recommended to be together (have sex). This is a relatively natural fertility solution with some extra help. I think it’s an option for couples with good test results.

The second option is Artificial Insemination. The treatment starts with hormonal ovarian stimulation, and followed by a trigger injection. Even the most fertile days are determined by the doctor. However, the fertilization doesn’t take place by natural intercourse. By the end of the stimulation phase the male partner is asked for sperm collection. Sperms that have been washed and concentrated are placed directly in the woman’s uterus, cervix or fallopian tubes around the time the ovaries release one or more eggs to be fertilized. Insemination is usually recommended when everything is fine with the sperm and the woman’s fallopian tubes (or at least one of them) are permeable. The procedure is completely painless, it’s less expensive compared to IVF, but the success rate is lower: only 15-20%.

The next option is IVF (In Vitro Fertilization), which I think is the most known fertility treatment type. The main difference compared to the previous treatments is that the fertilization happens outside the body – ‘in vitro’ means ‘in a test tube’. The procedure is longer, more expensive, more complicated and involves a higher hormonal load than insemination.

What are the main stages you are going to undergo during an IVF treatment?

1. Ovarian Stimulation. The goal of ovarian stimulation is to achieve multifollicular development by administering daily hormone injections, hoping more follicles, more eggs will be available for fertilization. There are several different medication protocols in use to achieve this. In the case of short protocol, the stimulation starts on Day 2 or 3 of the menstrual cycle, and takes about 7-11 days. The long protocol can take up to 4 weeks. It starts on Day 20 of the menstrual cycle with a 10-day long medication which helps to shut down the ovaries first. In step two the same ovarian stimulation starts as in the short protocol.
2. Trigger Injection. If the follicles are sufficiently mature, the Trigger helps the growth and maturing of eggs.
3. Egg retrieval, and Sperm Collection. 36 hours after the Trigger Injection the Egg Retrieval is going to take place. Using ultrasound, the fluid containing the eggs is collected from the follicles through the vagina with a needle. At the same time sperm is collected from the male partner.
4. Fertilization. After collection, the eggs and sperm are cleaned in the embryologist’s laboratory, then a group of sperm is put together with the eggs to be fertilized. Practically the same thing happens in the incubator as in nature. There is no special intervention, they just organize a date between the eggs and sperm.
5. Embryo development. The fertilized eggs spend 3-5 days in a special incubator at the embryology lab. The embryo divides and multiplies its cells. The embryologist selects the most viable embryo(s) for transfer by the end of the process.
6. Embryo transfer. 3-5 days after fertilization, the most viable embryos are transferred back to the uterus with a simple, quick and painless procedure.
7. 2-week-wait. The time period from embryo transfer to pregnancy test. If all goes well, implantation takes place during this time, and the embryo attaches to the uterus lining and continues its development there.

It’s also good to know about ICSI (Intracytoplasmic Sperm Injection), as a special type of IVF treatment. It is practically one of the methods used in egg fertilization. It is usually recommended when sperm quality is not the best, or only a few eggs are available for fertilization. During ICSI procedure the embryologist selects the most beautiful and healthiest sperm and injects it directly into the egg. This can increase the chances of successful fertilization.

We also have to talk about the classic in vivo fertilization. Simply put, have sex because anything can happen at any time. We can meet a million wonderful stories; I also have several close friends who once had a baby arriving magically. Yet they had a paper about that impossibility. Never give up!

IVF is an emotional roller coaster that we have to be prepared for not only physically, but also emotionally. In my opinion, we do not speak about this particular side of IVF enough.

My partner and I are new to the world of IVF, but we are completely aware that this journey will be full of emotional ups and downs. The fact that we do not even know what is going to happen to us during the process or what the outcome will be… it just does not make it any easier.

Instead of listening to others, focus on listening to your own body and soul.

The whole process of preparing for our first IVF cycle looked quite fascinating, and, surprisingly, simple at the same time, especially the technical side of it. However, we do not know how we are going to react to the treatment itself and how we are going to face all of the upcoming challenges. But most importantly, what is the outcome going to be?

It feels impossible to prepare for everything. However, there are two things that are extremely important in order to get through all of the challenges together: a solid foundation in a relationship and, above all, communication. Talking about feelings, fears and even doubts in these new, unknown life situations with maximum understanding and open minds is key to tackling them together.

We visited a specialist who handles the emotional side of infertility and fertility treatments. We had sessions individually and together as a couple. It was very liberating for me to speak openly about my feelings, especially when discussing my fears. The therapist and I discussed all the emotional phases that me and my partner are most probably going to face during the treatment. It still feels like a very abstract way to describe what lies ahead of us, but at least we got another guideline that can help us get through all of it. By the end of our sessions, we built a list of some great suggestions and tips for our upcoming journey. These are not magic tricks but they can probably be useful for anyone who is on the same path as us.

1. Instead of listening to others, focus on listening to your own body and soul
2. Try to limit the use of Google. Chances are that googling will only add to your stress.
3. Plan your days ahead. This can help you to reduce anxiety and stress
4. Go for a walk or perform light exercise, such as yoga. Your body will produce dopamine and release endorphins. These are known as “happy” hormones and they have the ability to lift you up when you are feeling down.
5. Try to do something creative every day. Activities such as painting, drawing, colouring or even baking can increase positive emotions, reduce stress and decrease anxiety.
6. Keep a diary. Writing your feelings down on a page will help you express yourself better. Journaling can also help you reduce stress and prioritise your fears and concerns.
7. Learn how to relax. Meditation is a great way to harbour self confidence and improve stress and anxiety, which can be a part of the IVF process.

The chances for a successful IVF can be significantly increased with a well-prepared body and mind. Let’s focus on our body first.

Until now, I was a little bit confused by the technical process of IVF, and to be honest, I did not think much about what I can do to increase our odds of success. We spent most of our time and energy on finding the right clinic, choosing the best doctor, getting all of our tests done in time, but do we know how to prepare our body to become the perfect place for our future baby?

Do your best but take it easy. Do not make any major or significant changes during this time, like going gluten free, vegan or start training for a Marathon if you were not doing so already. We do not have to be superwomen (because we already are). We just have to try to do our best.

As I just recently learnt, preparation of the body is as important for IVF as other stages of the fertility treatment. Preparing the body should begin 4 to 8 weeks prior to the start of the actual IVF cycle. This means that it is not enough to start living a healthier lifestyle at the beginning of the actual treatment.

A well-prepared body may tolerate the IVF treatment better. It could have a great impact on the egg quality, as well as our hormonal environment, which can result in a significant increase in our odds of a successful fertility program.

I found some helpful tips that could be beneficial for all of us ladies going through fertility treatments:

1. Use your diet as a fertility booster

Starting now, eat healthy, balanced meals. The following tips can be obvious for some women, but to be honest, not all of them were obvious to me, so it is helpful to address them again:

Say goodbye to processed foods and focus on clean eating as much as possible

Fill up on fresh fruits and vegetables. Leafy greens are especially good for us

If you are a meat lover, stay away from red meat and choose free-range chicken and wild caught fish instead.

Avoid refined grains, and try to incorporate whole grains, such as quinoa and whole grain pasta.

High protein diet is very favourable. Opt for beans, chickpeas and lentils in your diet

Switch to full-fat dairy products. Greek yoghurt is an excellent choice.

Eat healthy fats, such as avocado, extra virgin olive oil, nuts and seeds

Try to limit your salt intake. Flavour your food with herbs and other spices instead

2. Vitamins

The selection of your vitamins and minerals should be discussed with your doctor. Your provider will tell you exactly which vitamins and other supplements you should take based on the results of your blood tests. I had to start taking vitamin D, which plays a significant role in fertility by acting on the ovaries and the endometrium, as well as folic acid, which is an important vitamin for both men and women who are trying to conceive. Aside from these three supplements I have decided to take vitamin C to boost my immunity, and CoQ10, which helps the eggs to stay healthy. My advice to you is to invest in high quality vitamins if you decide to start taking any.

3. Smoking, alcohol, caffeine

All of us probably know that drinking alcohol and smoking cigarettes is not a good idea while trying to conceive, so I do not feel like it is necessary to discuss this topic. However, what should we do about caffeine? Excessive consumption of caffeine has a negative effect on female fertility, so keep your caffeine intake below 200 milligrams a day, which includes your coffee, tea and soda drinks consumption. 200 milligrams is equal to two mugs of tea (350 ml), one mug of filtered coffee, two mugs of instant coffee, five cans of cola or two energy drinks.

4. Get enough sleep

Sleep and fertility are closely connected. A 2013 study on sleep and fertility found that the pregnancy rate for those who sleep 7 to 8 hours every night was significantly higher than those who slept for shorter or longer durations. A hormone called melatonin regulates both sleep and reproduction. It peaks between 9pm and midnight, therefore the ideal time to fall asleep would be between 10 pm to 11 pm.

5. Workout

Too low or too high levels of BMI (body mass index) can have a negative impact on fertility, therefore it is important to keep active to achieve and maintain a healthy BMI. Taking part in moderate exercise regularly can help boost your fertility. Walking, jogging, yoga and Pilates can be a fantastic choice of exercise, if you are not a sporty girl like me. It is recommended to be active at least 30 minutes a day, and taking a 10 minute walk three times a day definitely counts!

+1 Just do your best!

It’s time to take our part of the fertility journey: let’s boost the little guys.

There are very few men left on the planet who don't need any help to boost their fertility. I am not one of them, so I decided to do as much as possible to improve my sperms’ health. I am going to have very little to do during our IVF program compared to my wife, so this is the least I can do to increase our chance of success.

"With any positive changes, we can do a lot to consciously improve our fertility."

Let’s continue to learn more factors which can affect the health of our sperms and male fertility.

1. Ideal weight: Both too much and too little fat have a negative effect on hormone production, and sperm health and count. Moreover, in overweight men, fat pads warm the testicles, and as we learned, sperms don’t like heat. Weight is something that we cannot change overnight. Making a significant and healthy change on it, can take months (sometimes even years). Losing or gaining weight should be part of a well-planned preparation. I have 4-5kg extra weight on me, and it is impossible to lose (in a healthy way) in 4 weeks (at least for me).

1. Caffeine: The most popular stimulant. That's how I start the day every morning. But keep in mind that energy drinks and cola also contain caffeine. Funnily caffeine can be a double-sharp weapon. In a small amount it stimulates sperm production in small amounts. Great news! However, in larger quantities, it can be one of the causes of sperm deterioration, and also can reduce its quantity. Another important fact that is important to remember, that beverages that contain caffeine, have diuretic effects and may cause dehydration, which is not good at all when we try to conceive. I am a coffee lover but fortunately I am not a big fan of energy and soft drinks. So, it will be easy for me to be a good boy on this.

1. Exercise: Sport is one of the best things in the world if you do it within normal limits. It relieves tension (so you can reduce stress), creates good conditions, and makes you balanced. It can help you reach your ideal weight as well. But you don't want to be Schwarzenegger for now. Do not touch anabolic steroids, muscle and weight gainers. Firstly, your testicle can get smaller (you will look stupid), secondly, you can even reset your sperm count with them.

1. Toxins: Unfortunately, improper nutrition already delivers a lot of toxins into our bodies. We can come into contact with many toxins at work and home (solvents, cleaners, pesticides) as well. Try to avoid them if it is not possible, or at least use appropriate protective equipment.

Obviously, there are many things listed above that are difficult to change. These are just some important factors – at least - to be aware of. With any positive changes we can do a lot to consciously improve our fertility. And if we were “accidentally” keeping these lifestyle changes for the long term and living healthier by the way, we could hold not only our own child, but hopefully even our grandchildren in our hands. Is it enough motivation? Is there more motivation than that?

Step 1 of preparation: speak the IVF language.

I believe that self-education is a very important step for IVF preparation. You can find plenty of articles and studies to read. One topic is going to lead to another, giving you endless information about IVF and all its details.

"To be honest, it was very difficult for me to understand the comments at first, because of these almost code-like short form terms. It is like a secret language which is spoken by our special community only."

Visiting fertility or IVF forums can be really helpful as well, and these are a great source of information especially for a new bird like me. It helps me to know what is going to happen with me, and I also can gain knowledge from other’s experience (and sometimes learn from other’s mistakes, for example: why don’t take a pregnancy test too early).

I don’t know how much time you have spent on IVF or fertility blogs, but if you have visited at least one, you might have noticed that it’s full of acronyms. To be honest, it was very difficult for me to understand the comments at first, because of these almost code-like short form terms. It is like a secret language which is spoken by our special community only.

To make the life of the new birdies – as myself – easier, I decided to collect the basics of the IVF vocabulary. Have fun, learn a lot, educate yourself!

2WW: 2 weeks wait (from embryo transfer until pregnancy test)

AF: Aunt Flo, Period, or Menstrual Cycle

BCP: Birth Control Pills

BA: Baby Aspirin (low-dose aspirin to improve chances)

BD: Baby Dance (sex)

Beta: HCD pregnancy test

BFN: Big Fat Negative (negative pregnancy test)

BFP: Big Fat Positive (positive pregnancy test)

CB: Cycle Buddy (someone who is on IVF at the same time)

CD: (menstrual) cycle day

DE: Donor Egg

DH: Dear Husband

DI: Donor Husband (sperm donor)

DPO: Days Post-Ovulation

DPR: Days Post-Retrieval

DPT: Days Post-(Embryo)Transfer

DP5DT: Days Post 5-Day Transfer

DW: Dear Wife

EPT: Early Pregnancy Test

ER: Egg Retrieval

ET: Embryo Transfer

Frostie: Frozen Embryo

FSH: Follicle-Stimulating Hormone

HCG: Human Chorionic Gonadotropin (pregnancy hormone)

HPT: Home Pregnancy Test

HX: History

IF: Infertility

IUI: Intra-Uterine Insemination

IVF: In Vitro Fertilization

LMP: Last Menstrual Period (first day)

LSP: Low Sperm Count

MC: Miscarriage

MF: Male Factor

O, OV: Ovulation

OB/GYN: Obstetrician / Gynecologist

OHSS: Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome

PCOS: Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome

PG: Pregnant

PMS: Pre-Menstrual Syndrome

POAS: Pee On a Stick

RE: Reproductive Endocrinologist

RPL: Recurrent Pregnancy Loss

SA: Semen Analysis

S/S: Signs/Symptoms

TTC: Trying To Conceive

TX: Treatment

US: Ultrasound

WNL: Within Normal Limits

How you can improve sperm quality and quantity with some changes in your daily life and habits. Beware, you might notice positive changes in other areas of your life as well.

If you are like me, you never really paid attention to your sperms (I mean in a scientific way). It completely changed when I received my sperm analysis result, and it’s not too great a number. I felt like it’s time to learn more about them (especially when it comes to their parameters).

"Studies show that a smoker has 15% less sperms compared to a non-smoker, and more lazy sperms with abnormal shape."

I read about many factors which can cause sperms with abnormal shape, not enough quantity or pure concentration. BUT I also learned that actually there are many things that I can do, and make improvements on these parameters. These are mainly lifestyle changes, and most of them don't cost too much, I just need to pay a bit more attention and be willing to change.

1. Smoking: I was a heavy smoker for 15 years, but I quit 15 years ago though. I know exactly how hard quitting is. (This is not the easiest lifestyle change, I know, but I wanted to start with the most difficult one.) BUT you have to know smoking has a huge negative impact on the quality and quantity of your sperms. The problem is mainly caused by the nicotine (so electric cigarettes are not really an option either). Studies show that a smoker has 15% less sperms compared to a non-smoker, and more lazy sperms with abnormal shape. SMOKING + ABNORMAL SHAPE + LAZY SPERM = NOT IDEAL!
2. Alcohol: At this point I started to be worried a bit (I love red wine). Actually, I don’t have to be abstinent (a big release!), I just have to be careful with the quantity. 2-3 glasses of wine or beer weekly won’t do a huge harm on my sperms. A bigger dosage of alcohol would lower the chances of my boys, because they can have an abnormal shape and a smaller army in numbers. It sounds doable to me.
3. Drugs: I cannot share any personal experience about this point, but what I learn for sure: they don’t do any good for our hormones. They can reduce our testosterone level, have a negative effect on the shape of sperm, and the sperms go nuts (as you do) if you are on drugs (I don’t know what does it mean exactly, they might move too fast?).
4. Heat: It never even would cross my mind. Using my laptop on my laps, or enjoying the comfort of the seat heating in the car actually can overheat my sperms. They don’t need too much heat as they are super sensitive. If they get some extra, unwanted heat on their outer layer, it’s enough for them to die. Riding a bicycle, spending time in a sauna can also cause extra heat. It is also better to switch from hot baths to showers for the health of our sperms. I think here I am going to face some difficulties (laptop usage, love of hot baths and bicycling).
5. Stress: I know, it’s easy to say, do not stress these days. At least be aware that too much stress has a huge negative impact on every area of your life. Speaking about sperms: it decreases the concentration, makes them lazy, and will affect the shape as well. So, just take it easy!

There are still a few possible lifestyle changes I would like to share with you in my next articles, but I find it easier to take these changes step by step.

How we won an extra month for IVF preparation. Always see the bright side.

While waiting for the second beta-HCG test unfortunately my period arrived. Of course, I was still hoping that all could still be alright, as you can find many stories of successful pregnancies of women having periods while pregnant. Unfortunately, my blood test confirmed later that the HCG level dropped, meaning the pregnancy ended.

I really needed some time to digest what just happened....

"According to Dr. Lauren Averbuch study, 30-50% of women have had one chemical pregnancy in their fertile years, but many women don’t even know about it if they don’t take a pregnancy test."

The pregnancy was real, that’s for sure. Which is amazing news, because it means I am able to conceive, we are able to make a baby.

I had a ‘chemical pregnancy’, also called a ‘very early miscarriage’, which happens on the fourth or fifth week of pregnancy. Actually, chemical pregnancies are fairly common. According to Dr. Lauren Averbuch study, 30-50% of women have had one chemical pregnancy in their fertile years, but many women don’t even know about it if they don’t take a pregnancy test. This type of miscarriage is usually caused by some kind of chromosomic, genetic abnormality of the developing embryo. It’s somewhat comforting that in almost all articles I read about this topic it was clearly written that it cannot be my fault, I could not do anything to prevent it. I decided to believe it, and not to carry the anxiety with me.

When my period ended, I paid a visit to my doctor. He confirmed that he cannot see anything to worry about. Everything is in great order inside and my uterus lining started to build up again. New month, new chances. ☺ He gave me three good reasons to be positive:

1. This unexpected pregnancy confirms that we are able to have a baby. The egg of mine and the sperm of my husband were happy to meet, and they are ready to cooperate.
2. Because of the hormonal changes caused by the pregnancy, we have a higher chance to conceive again in the next few months.
3. If we are ready, we can start our IVF treatment by my next period.

As we have to wait one more month to (finally) start our first cycle, we decided that we are going to use this extra time for some preparation, and boost our bodies and minds as much as we can.

TIP: Don't drive yourself mental during your fertility journey by getting a diagnosis of your symptoms by Dr. Google. Don’t do this to yourself.